Give Me Kitchens

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There comes a point in every morning when you just medically-require caffeine. Like WiFi and parking spaces, soon coffee is going to be written into contracts like human rights are written into…a bill of rights. Human rights. I think one of those exists somewhere; in fact, I really hope it does because I want to take a glance and see what I haven’t been claiming. Maybe there’s a PDF somewhere…

The Futurist Club meeting tonight was all about the rights of the future, and Jocelyn presented an interesting argument about how modern kitchen designs are going to be a big thing in Melbourne for accessibility. I think this might just be Jocelyn thinking wishfully, as she is wont to do, because she never stops talking about kitchen renovations and design. She was all ears when the discussion turned to holographic renovation and its feasibility, and when Jayne (yes, I’m going to say her name) told her that in the future, kitchens can be pulled apart and renovated as easily as moving things around inside a doll’s house due to extra-special teleport technology, Jocelyn was basically weeping. She wept later as well, but for the opposite reason.

But an argument made from passion is always worth hearing, and Jocelyn laid out her solid reasons for why, in the future, kitchen renovations will be a form of currency on account of them being super cool, and how she really wants them. Also, they’re going to be written into a company contract, like pension funds and company cars, except it’s the ability to design your own kitchen.

“And that, friends, is why kitchen design is the way of the future,” Jocelyn said, sitting down to applause. Ah, bless her. She’s totally mad, talks about nothing else. But here’s me always going on about needing coffee, so we all have our vices.